There is nothing more painful in life than losing a loved one or a cherished friend. It is easy to feel alone and confused when someone you care about passes. When that happens to someone close to you, there are many things you can do to give comfort.
Don’t Hold Your Tongue
Sometimes not saying anything can do more damage. Death is a real event and deserves to be recognized and addressed. Try to avoid saying things such as, “I know how you feel,” or speaking for them. Restrain yourself from sharing your own personal stories of loss unless they ask you to. Express that you are so sorry for their pain, or ask them to share a memory about the person. Let them know that their grief is ok in whatever form it takes. Check on them frequently, but avoid asking how they are doing – it may cause them to focus on their grief. Instead, just let them know are thinking of them.
Show Your Support
Be there for all the events that surround the funeral, such as the viewing, the funeral service, graveside or another memorial service Orange CA holds for the deceased. If you are close, offer to escort them so they are not alone. If they have family or other support, at least nod or wave to them so that they notice you are there.
Don’t Desert Them
Everyone is interested in making contact in the first few weeks following a death, but then people tend to drop off, leaving the bereaved person to weather it alone. Make contact often, especially during the first year when the grieving process is strongest. Invite your friend to join you for lunch or a movie. Build distractions into your contact to help them move on.
Don’t do what you would want or need, do what they need. Showing your support for someone who has lost a loved one can also strengthen your relationship with them and deepen your compassion for others.